"Your blog can be about positive things too!"
-A Life Changing Friend
There was once a time I used to live life scared..
Scared by the meanings bound by words..
Scared by the repercussions of actions for gain..
Scared by companionship..
So..
My response was denial and opposition..
I avoided the use of words of meaning..
I avoided the use of actions for gain..
I avoided companionship and friendship entirely..
However..
There was an uncalculated variable concealed within a single existence..
By fate..
By chance..
By destiny..
By coincidence..
I met you again.
Despite never having shared a word once for all these years..
I've never let myself believe in fate or destiny..
But..
You have made a believer out of me..
With those 'Earnest' eyes of yours..
In you I believed..
In you I trusted..
In you I lived..
True again.
I used words that once lost all meaning..
Only to find words that once gripped me with fear..
Only to find the same words changing my life again..
For the better..
In you I "Care"..
In you I "Trust"..
In you I "Believe"..
In you There is "Forever"..
In you There is "Friendship True"..
In you There is "Belong"..
In you I "Want"..
In you I "Need"..
In you..
I "Love".
I acted on an instinct once extinct..
Sharing my life with yours..
Because I wanted a better grade of life..
For myself even if I never wanted to admit it..
Despite surface denial..
Despite claims to selflessness..
Meeting you..
Trusting you..
Sharing my heart with yours..
Was my personal act of "Escapism".
I let my guard down so I could make a friend..
Were you to ask me who my friends were 131 days ago..
I would of told you..
"No one."
If you are to ask me today who my friends are now..
I will tell you..
"Everyone.. Along with a best friend that loves her hair more than her life"
And, I'll smile saying it the same way I smile typing it.
And..
If it wasn't for my "Malaysian Stubborn - Ness"
I wouldn't stop myself at teary..
I would instead cry..
I would cry tears of "True" happiness..
Out of pure gratitude for having met you..
It is the very same stubborn nature that prevents me from admittance..
Admitting that I have emotions..
Admitting that I have now become a happier person..
Admitting that I want to keep you in my life for my own selfish reasons..
And..
Although I could never ever say this to anyone..
Admitting that my greatest sadness was my lack friends..
And inability to keep a single best friend..
Or.. To even have a best friend..
But that has all changed..
Because..
Of you.
From my single leap of faith to trust you..
I now lead a life I could never of dreamed off..
A better grade of life..
A happier life.
Some days..
I am even brave enough to say I am truly happy..
Days of having only just hung out with you moments before..
So..
Thank you.
Thank you for enriching this man's life with joy once more.
From meeting and trusting you..
Emotions have become part of my way of life once again..
You showed me how to live..
And in return I showed you I could do the same..
I found friends..
I found best friends..
I found love interests..
I learned to smile from the heart..
I learned to laugh from the heart..
I learned to live.
And, even though I have resolved to never cry again..
For you..
I am willing to break this self promise..
Because to me..
You are worth it..
There isn't a single thing in this world that I wouldn't do for you..
Except shave my head.. That's just crazy.
Or admit to being ticklish when you try..
Or stop using metaphors around you..
Or stop using big words around you..
Or say that you're the cooler sibling.. (You wish..)
Or unfortunately stop being late.. (Natural Malaysian way.. Have to at least be a minute late)
Or let you beat me in any game..
Or in any other competition..
Or stop calling you skux.. (For purposes of a nicer word)
Or stop being stubborn.. (I just have to be.. I really do..)
And.. Let you treat me to dinner..
But everything else I will do no problem!
You told me to make a positive blog..
And even though you never said it..
I'm sure it was implied that I keep my metaphors out of it..
So..
Here it is..
For the world to see..
That a person as impossible as you does exist..
My first ever positive blog.
Dedicated to you.
For.. A Life Changing Friend.
For.. A best Friend
For.. A Sister..
For.. Family.
<3
Thank you..
For being in my life..
For all that you have done..
And.. For all that you are and all that you do.
I am Happy at heart.. =)
